The Cost of Flexibility: How One Mom Navigated Career Setbacks and Built Something of Her Own (Anonymous Share)

The Story

When I asked her when things first started to shift at work, she didn’t hesitate:

“On my 1st maternity leave, I was called to return back at 8 weeks since my replacement didn't work out. For my 2nd maternity leave, I was called to return again—this time because my boss, the HR Director, couldn't lead the recruitment team.”

And when she told them she planned to use all her PTO and couldn’t come back early?

“They seemed upset.”

What she returned to wasn’t what she had been promised.

“When I eventually returned, I was on a career path to take over Employee Engagement. But three months later, they announced an HR reorganization and promoted another person.”

The Challenges

After beingasked what made her stay after all that, her answer was something I’ve heard from many moms:

“I’ve literally stayed in a lower level role with no upward mobility due to the flexibility of working from home.”

She tried to invest in herself and advocate for more.

“Last year I paid $1,500 to get my SHRM-CP certificate on my own. I’ve asked my boss about working on more strategic projects but they say we don’t have any. So I plan events and order SWAG—but I have an MBA.”

She also shared what happened when she tried to reclaim the role she had previously held.

“They pushed me out of my recruiting manager position when I returned from my 2nd leave and told me that position required travel. So I transitioned to an HRBP, my current role—which apparently I’m at the max comp for. Unreal, I know.”

And then came the review.

“I just had a review and was told no pay increase since I’m at the max. When I asked why I wasn’t told about the pay range, they were silent.”

What Worked (and What Hurt)

I asked if anything had brought her joy again—any spark of herself that had returned.

“I decided to start my passion project on Instagram to help women learn about money. This has filled my cup by helping other women.”

But that doesn’t mean the wounds have healed.

“Full-on postpartum. I would cry to my husband about the unfair treatment. I’m still hurt by the office politics and how no one accommodates working moms. If I would’ve quit, it would’ve hurt us financially, so I’ve stuck it out.”

Still, she’s turning that pain into progress.

“Now I’m fully building my personal brand, to never have to rely on a job and paycheck again.”

What I Wish I’d Known

When I asked what she’d tell her younger self—or another couple planning for kids—she didn’t miss a beat:

“I wish when we got married someone would've told us to save money to take a year off after each child. Now I teach young couples about saving for this.”

Tools, Resources, and Community

I wanted to know what helped her during the toughest points—and what she still wishes had existed.

“I found a Moms on Maternity luncheon in Orange County. Just being surrounded by other moms helped. I wish there were more resources. I probably should’ve done some counseling and extended my leave.”

“I also would like to see corporations offer tools and benefits. My employer doesn’t have a maternity policy—so we only have the state disability program.”

Advice for Other Parents

Her advice isn’t just motivational—it’s tactical.

“Now that I’ve seen what is possible about growing your own brand, I would encourage other parents to write out their skills and take courses if needed. Start somewhere—doing consulting gigs. Tell people you are building to help with new baby costs.”

“Find community groups you can plug into. I’ve had tremendous growth by being a guest on other podcasts, networking with mom groups—and the momentum keeps me going.”

“My goal is for my financial coaching to replace my day job so I can quit the toxic workplace.”

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This story was submitted anonymously- thank you!

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